It's not gay if I eat my own pecs, right?

Every time I glance at a photo of The Situation quickly, I think he’s a toned Asian girl begging for beads.

I feel very strongly that if someone were to lick the icing off his shorts, it would expose the smallest cake boner you and I have ever seen.

I guarantee 4 months from now we’re going to watch a cake show where a gay “cake artist” breaks down into tears because he can’t get the shading of these abs to look right.